Georgia’s Eurovision Song: We Don’t Wanna Put In. And We Don’t Wanna Putin.

Eurovision, the all-Europe song annual song contest, has always been somewhat politicized. While in the past, most post-contest arguments pertained to what nation voted for what candidate, recent developments indicate a new Cold War in Europe: that between Russia and some of it’s post-Soviet neighbors.

In 2007, Ukraine’s Verka Serduchka sang what s/he claimed to have been “Lasha Tumbai” (a meaningless combination of sounds, really), but everyone heard “Russia, Goodbye.”

In 2008, Russia responded with Dima Bilan, who sang alongside an Olympic golden medalist Yevgeniy Plyushchenko to the accompanying Hungarian violist Edvin Marton. Dima Bilan became the first Russian to have won the Eurovision (Ukraine has two victories under her belt).

As the preparations for the 2009 contest are on the way, things are getting political. While most countries have not held the qualifying finals for their participants, Georgia announced its candidate, the band Stephane&3G that was specifically tailored to enter Eurovision. The country has only been participating in the Eurovision since 2007. Here are some of the lyrics:

We don’t wanna put in

The negative move

It’s killin’ the groove

There is a really awesome YouTube video of this song:


It certainly has a Eurovision winner potential: it is catchy, clearly inspired by American pop bands, and it has three girls with an exotic accent in tight PVC tops and mini-shorts. And it mentions drinking moonshine. That, along with the song’s message, will probably guarantee it many votes from the amused Western Europe and Russia-hating Eastern European countries.

Ironically, this year’s Eurovision will be held in Moscow (Russia’s Dima Bilan won last year), so “We Don’t Wanna Put In” will sound even more provocative. If the Eurovision organizing committee does allow this song to be performed (there were questions raised as to its appropriateness), I wonder what the Kremlin’s reaction will be.

I can see why the Georgians are so tongue-in-cheek regarding their behemoth neighbor, but that’s a petty way to deliver a protest, isn’t it? Georgia, if you are still mad over Abkhazia and Ossetia, go to a court of law, not the performance stage.

Putin v. Oil Prices

Several months ago, before the oil prices began plummeting, I read an article somewhere that left me confused. It was in a well-respected publication — Foreign Affairs, I believe — and written by a serious author. It claimed that if oil prices go below $25/barrel, Putin’s incredible approval ratings will slip, and the leadership of Russia might change. There were other serious articles in serious publications estimating that number to be $4o or even $5o. As I see it, the logic behind these prognoses was as follows : if the inflow of petrodollars stops, the Russians will lose jobs, earn less, not be able to pay their mortgage etc. People will be angry. And they will aim their anger at Medvedev and Putin, ending their almost unconditional support for them.

Now that the oil prices are hovering at $40, it is a good time to analyze these statements and to post factum claim they were incorrect . Oil prices haven’t reached $25/barrel yet, but Russians have been laid off en masse (the unemployment rate went up more than 1% since September, from 5-something% to 6-something%), and there are government agency projections of over 250 thousand more losing their jobs in the first quarter of 2008. Who knows how many more are going to lose their jobs after that? Many companies switched to 4-days workweeks. They cut salaries, and cancelled their employees’ free gym memberships. People are panicking. With the dollar and euro exchange rates going up, it is challenging to find either kind of currency in many provincial cities. Everyone wants to buy foreign currencies to avoid losing much money if the ruble becomes drastically devalued.

Yet, Putin’s approval rating are stellar. And I believe they will remain that way.

Political cycles of the Western world — economy gets worse, the incumbent has fewer chances of getting re-elected, so a new leader steps up, lather, rinse, repeat — do not apply to Russia. The Russians are simply not used to such mode of thinking. Historically, the vast majority of population was in the state of continuous pauperization under the czars. In the USSR, most people were not starving, but not rich, either; they were all equally poor. In the early 90’s, under Yeltsin, food was often rationed. His approval ratings were never impressive, but he did win his second election and had the nation elect the man he hand-picked as his predecessor.

Yeltsin was almost impeached in 1999, only a year after the tough August crisis of 1998. But economic problems were only one of the five charges against him. The impeachment never went through, although it did contribute to Yeltsin eventually resigning. When Yeltsin assumed power, the economy was bad to begin with, and he did not produce any successful or popular reforms. In fact, many people were in doubt whether it was a good idea for the USSR to collapse: breaking up the USSR was another impeachment charge against Yeltsin.

Back then, Russia had an ageing president with serious health and alcohol issues. He had to undergo a seven-hour heart surgery while in the office. To make fun of the videos of him inebriated was a common pastime for stand-up comedians and regular citizens alike. He kept sacking prime ministers and making puzzling decisions, never bothering to explain them to the country. Putin in many ways is the exact opposite. He is athletic, well-dressed, relatively young, and a non-drinker. It easy to assume that someone who is ill and struggles to speak in public and to explain his choices makes poor decision. Likewise, it is easy to trust a control-wielding president who clearly explains his political choices and practices knocking down judo opponents for fun.

But that is not the major difference between Putin and Yeltsin.

Putin gave Russia a direction in which to move. After the USSR collapsed, general population was very confused. In the USSR, people played by the rules, albeit hypocritical and nonsensical ones. In public, one praised the Party; in private, one listened to the Beatles and read books by the dissidents. If one wanted promotion, a new apartment, imported furniture, one knew whom to bribe.

And all of a sudden, it was all over. No one knew what to do, what to say, what to believe in. Even religion, the common last resort at times of upheaval, was foreign and semi-forgotten. The most talented artists, musicians, professionals went to great lengths to immigrate. With fifteen new states, many found themselves having to cross a border to visit friends and family. While some struggled to find morals, some abandoned them altogether and entered the capitalist world of making money.

The charismatic leader who stood on the tank and promised a better future turned out to be as confused as the rest of the population. It was the dark ages of the Russian history, condensed into less than one decade. And then came Putin, and it was a renaissance.

He brought along positive economic changes. Russians began traveling and learning foreign languages. No one had to queue for hours to get regular consumer goods. The gap between the center and the periphery was still drastic, but even the periphery was doing better. The political scientists’ assumption that Putin will stop being so popular is all that is taken away makes sense. But there is something else that Putin achieved.

Russians now know who they are. They take pride on being a strong country that is feared by many states. Nationalism is a way to go. Orthodox Christianity is respected, and churches attract flocks of new believers. To name kids with traditionally Russian names is now a good idea. To memorize the anthem and have a Russian flag is an even better one. Everyone knows in what to believe: Saakashvili needs a sedative, Yuschenko needs a retirement, guest workers need one-way tickets home.

The West finds many of these trends disturbing. But the Russians are not about to give up their new-found identity in exchange for the Western concepts of personal freedoms — that Russia had never had anyway. Putin is a part of that identity, and it would take much more than extra-low oil prices to surgically remove him from it.

There is another ace up Russia’s ruling duo’s sleeves. Since the crises’ first symptoms were diagnosed in the US, the Russian media were successful in equaling the US in general to the root cause of this crisis.”So, how is the US doing? They are guilty of this crisis, aren’t they?” Many Russians feel that the crises is just a continuation of the US’s idée fixe is to destroy Russia.

To be fair, there are articles describing problems with other states’ policies and their contribution to the current global financial crisis, but somehow, they don’t stick with the general population. Anti-American authors and politicians are attracting a lot of attention (check out this Wall Street Journal article about a Russian academic who claims that by 2010, South and North Carolina will be a part of the EU).

This trend of anti-Americanism causes a great deal of the rally effect — people uniting against one enemy. It was successfully used by the post-Soviet states: accuse Russia of all your present troubles, and you got the population supporting you like crazy. Now Russia is using it for its own purposes: to shift the blame to the US, shall if be needed. How can you blame the prime-minister for the crisis, if it the US’s fault anyway?

In 1998, right before the crisis, the government went out of their way to promise nothing really bad would happen to the country’s economy. When the economy collapsed, people felt disappointed and betrayed, just like they did for centuries. Now that the country has leaders who are not afraid to admit 2009 will be difficult, Russians are not about to let go of them.

Being Fashionable in Eastern Europe and Beyond

Call me crazy, conservative, and non-Slavic, but I can’t wear a mini skirt and glittery, strappy sandals to work. Ironically, I spend enough time shopping, matching clothes, and collecting high-heeled shoes for my friends to make fun of me. Most of the time, I tend to be on the overdressed side. But not by Kievan standards. For the past few weeks, I have been feeling quite underdressed.

“So, where do all the prostitutes work?”

Oh no, I thought. I am hallucinating from the hot Kiev weather and too many meetings with depressed and depressing Ukrainian political scientists.

A Ukrainian friend had another friend visiting from a European country where women in general, save for the Sex and the City fans, don’t fetishize high heels and mini skirts. He is a really nice but somewhat naïve guy who hadn’t traveled outside Europe before. He is really enjoying his stay in Kiev. He doesn’t mind hot weather, lack of air conditioning, or disastrous public transportation. He was warned about the mysterious Russian (in this case Ukrainian) soul and is very open minded. But taking him to a red lights district (if there is one in Kiev, of which I am not sure) is too extreme. What was my friend thinking?

“Where have you seen them?”

“On the metro every morning there are tons of them. Where are they going so early?”

And then it hit me. He seriously thought all the made-up ladies in revealing clothing he saw on the metro at 9am were in the business of selling their bodies. But they were just on the commute to work — which most likely didn’t involve selling their bodies.

The conversation above took place several days ago. Today, another friend told me a very similar story about a Dutch guy who asked the same question. This is just sad. The last few days have been really hot, so light, transparent and short clothing are a necessity.  Most men on the streets, Ukrainian and foreign alike, don’t seem to mind. They probably don’t mind women wearing clothes like that at work.

Call me crazy, conservative, and non-Slavic, but I can’t wear a mini skirt and glittery, strappy sandals to work. Ironically, I spend enough time shopping, matching clothes, and collecting high-heeled shoes for my friends to make fun of me. Most of the time, I tend to be on the overdressed side. But not by Kievan standards. For the past few weeks, I have been feeling quite underdressed.

Continue reading “Being Fashionable in Eastern Europe and Beyond”

Russian Yalie Encounters Disheartening Welcome at Russian Immigration

I have been in Russia for a while, busy re-uniting with the family and long-lost friends. I was supposed to have an internship in Hong Kong this summer, but things got immensely messed up (more venting on my part will come in a much more detailed post later), so for the next month I am a correspondent of a local newspaper, a TV anchor and a host of my own TV show (a little one, but still, a real one). Things are keeping me busy, so I don’t really have time to blog, but here is an interesting observation about Russia.

If a holder of an American passport or a Green Card flies into the US, they go through customs much faster than all those unlucky visa holders. The queues are always shorter, there seem to be more immigration officers on hand, and the smiles they dispense at the citizens are always nicer (NB: my personal observation, not a documented fact). If you enter Hong Kong with a permanent resident card, you just swipe the said card through a terminal — an voila, welcome home. This trend in general is true for the rest of the world — except for Russia.

Entering the Russian Federation is much easier for the foreigners than for the citizens of the Russian Federation. I was flying into Pulkovo-2 (international abbreviation LED) — an airport in St. Petersburg, which is dominated by the Russians returning from their European vacations. There are only two immigration booths for the Russians, while there were four or five for the foreigners.

The extremely unfriendly, sulking immigration officer (by the way, the ones working with the foreigner did smile at them; I tried taking a picture to prove, but was yelled at by the local security agents) went through an extensive number of visas in my passport and muttered something like, “why the f*** do you travel so much” (quoted verbatim, translation mine). She asked me how I “dared studying at the foreign university.” (because Moscow State is so much better than Yale, of course!) Then she asked me why my traveling passport looks worn-out. (because I travel a lot? An obvious answer). Then she finally — and very reluctantly — let me into my own country. I didn’t know if I should show extreme gratitude I was reluctantly allowed into my motherland — that’s what their demeanor suggested.

Welcome home, I guess.

PS: Apparently, Russia is actually one country with Belarus — or at least a union with it, according to the sign above the immigration booth at Pulkovo-2.

Yalies Get Excited Over a Downed Plane

MOSCOW — Georgia accused Russia on Monday of violating its airspace and using a MIG fighter jet to shoot down a Georgian reconnaissance drone over the separatist territory of Abkhazia on Sunday.

Several of my classmates and professors got really excited over watching footage of what appears to be a Russian jet shooting down a Georgian plane. So I thought I’d share it with you. There is even an English commentary by a Georgian military official. I am not an aviation expert, but the video appears to be real. Oh, and the Russians have been denying their fault. Most of the Russian newspapers I read only commented that the Ministry of Defense (should it be ‘offense’?) believes Georgia is making everything up. For instance, here (in Russian only) a fairly reputable Russian newspaper cites the Ministry of Defense spokeperson’s comments that call this incident “a hoax.” I guess Russians are not aware of that YouTube video just yet…

Russians “Pick” Orthodox Christianity

A couple of days ago, I wrote about Russia’s bothersome attempting to introduce an Orthodox Christian version of Valentine’s Day. Today’s issue of the New York Times has me even more worried: “At Expense of Others, Putin Picks a Church:”

This close alliance between the government and the Russian Orthodox Church has become a defining characteristic of Mr. Putin’s tenure, a mutually reinforcing choreography that is usually described here as working “in symphony.”

Mr. Putin makes frequent appearances with the church’s leader, Patriarch Aleksei II, on the Kremlin-controlled national television networks. Last week, Mr. Putin was shown prominently accepting an invitation from Aleksei II to attend services for Russian Orthodox Easter, which is this Sunday.

Even though Moscow has always been a beacon of Orthodox Christianity in Russia, Russia’s Muslim population is around 15-20% of its total population (10-15% of the total population are practicing believers, according to the World Factbook); a significant percentage of the population is Buddhist. Catholics, Protestants, Lutherans etc are also fairly well-represented in Russia.

Apparently, according to Kremlin’s bizarre logic, since the incumbent President belongs to Orthodox Christianity, no one should care about other religions. Did anyone just mention the word ‘democracy’?

Valentine’s Day: Not Good Enough for Russia

It is with great sadness that I observe growing nationalistic trends in Russia. Russian leadership goes to great lengths to get rid of the “negative Western influence.” Did you really think the Cold War was over?

Svetlana Medvedeva, the wife of Russian President-elect, recently announced her wish to introduce a Russian analogue of St. Valentine’s Day — and a religious one, too!

Russia has been embracing Christianity a lot more recently (Remember these pictures of bare-chested Putin wearing a crucifix?). Putin is quite a regular at the Christmas, Easter etc services. Now photos of Mrs. Medvedeva wearing a headscarf (all women are supposed to wear them inside an orthodox Christian church) and lighting a candle or talking to a priest are all over the Russian newspapers.

The holiday is supposed to celebrate two Russian Saints, Peter and Fevronia. Peter was a Russian prince. An evil serpent in a human form was paying supposedly unwanted nightly visits to his wife’s sister.

Peter, a noble Russian guy, killed that serpent, but the latter’s blood left his body covered in painful ulcers. Then he met a very wise peasant girl named Fevronia who asked him to marry her in exchange for curing him. He said he would marry her, but, in a typical Russian fairytale fashion, ignored his promise as soon as she helped him. But then his
ulcers came back, so he had to marry her. The prince and princess ruled over their share of Russia, became popular with the peasants, and lived happily ever after. When they died, they were buried apart at first, but then it was discovered their bodied ended up in the same coffin.

This story is warm and fuzzy, but I have a couple of questions to ask. Given that Fevronia blackmailed Paul into marrying her, can this holiday be viewed as a celebration of a female empowerment? Or as an indication to Russian women about how to treat their men?

As an atheist who is particularly allergic to the orthodox Christian tradition, I find this holiday disturbing. Valentine’s used to be a religious holiday, but it was consumerized a long time ago. So what is going to happen to Valentine’s in Russia?

If this “authentically Russian” holiday is indeed introduced to Russia, the number of holidays when single people feel miserable will be doubled. Or, if Presidents Medvedev and Putin like the plan, selling and buying traditional Valentine’s cards and gifts will be, you know, discouraged. After all, Saudi Arabia introduced a ban on selling red roses on Feb 14, 2008. Iran and Kuwait made repeated attempt to ban the holiday altogether. Russia is already following these countries’ example in terms of reducing democracy; isn’t it about time it banned Valentine’s, too?

Furry Boots: Straight Man’s Kryptonite

anna ershova in russiaWhat does one get for wearing PETA-unfriendly fluffy and furry winter boots? Apparently, lots of (unwanted) male attention.

The spring finally seems to be settling it here in New Haven, and as I was putting away all my winter clothes I came across a pair of winter boots that have made me very confused about men.

I went to Russia for the winter break last year, and brought along all the warmest clothes I had. However, because I had been living in Hong Kong at the time, my “warmest jacket” was actually a very thin blazer. Once I walked out of the airport in Moscow, I realized I had forgotten just how cold Russian winter can get. So I ended up rushing to the mall. Since I got really cold on the way there, I was looking for the warmest shoes and jacket possible. I faced a dilemma: either facing my own death by hypothermia or buying something that involved animals dying. Any shoes or jackets available had fur on them.

I managed to choose a jacket with the smallest amount of fur possible (still, why would anyone to have mink trimming on their pockets?). No such luck with boots: the warmest ones had sheep skin on the inside and lots of fluffy rabbit on the outside. I felt really bad for those rabbits, but I really, really, really wanted to make it through the winter break. So I bought those boots.

The winter was even colder this year. I went to Russia this winter break and made really good use of my warm clothes. I then decided to take some of them to New haven, since the weather forecast was not very promising for a hot weather aficionado like me.

To be honest, I was afraid that in the US some PETA activist would attack me, cut off the fur, and accuse me of crimes against animals. It would have been totally fair, but I did not want to throw the boots away having only gotten to wear them for a month total. I consoled myself with the thought that wasting one’s shoes is environmentally unfriendly anyway. And so my boots had their Yale debut… and Yalies (male ones, at least) turned out to be rather less environmentally conscious than I had thought.

For the first week of the semester, I observed the same intriguing male behavioral pattern. Guys I barely knew came over and announced my boots were “cool.” Then they reached over and tried to “pet” the dead rabbits’ fur. When it happened for the first time, I got scared. Here I was, sitting in a lecture browsing through the syllabus and this guy was trying to touch my shoes! Creepy, and strangely enough, it happened more than once.

My boots were complimented by some of the roughest and most unsentimental of men—those you would never imagine paying attention to anyone’s shoes. This list includes several policemen, coffee shop baristas, dining hall workers, an immigration official at JFK, and my teaching assistant.

Women never seemed to pay any attention to the furry masterpieces of the Italian shoemakers. I heard a couple of “oh your shoes are cute, nice to see you, bye’s” from friends, but that was it. So what was it that made so many (supposedly straight) men pay attention to my footwear? Did it make them feel like they were back in the Stone Age, when men would go off and hunt and their womenfolk would make fur shoes out of bear skins? Were they confused to see something that did not look like the ubiquitous “Uggs?” Did these boots have magic powers? I don’t have an answer.

Glossy magazines tell women they should wear strappy stilettos to attract men. I say, forget that and try furry flat-soled winter boots instead—just go for something synthetic, so the animals will fall for you, too.

Why I Am Not Going to Vote

I always thought voting was cool.

I remember accompanying my parents to the voting stations and being oh-so-jealous as they got to put a thick check mark next to the person they trusted to run a country for the next four years . Back then I wished I was 18, had a passport (an ultimate form of an identification for any Russian) and could also vote.

I couldn’t participate in the last presidential elections in 2004 because I was only 17. Hearing my family’s joyful stories about hanging out at the voting booths made me pretty jealous (I was at school in the US back then and everyone back home clearly thought I was missing out). Now that I am finally over 18 and there is a presidential election this coming Sunday, I can go vote. I won’t.

I don’t have an absentee ballot (apparently, to get one I had to be in Russia exactly one month before the elections, which makes fulfilling my citizen duties a bit too troublesome and expensive), but my consulate claims I can just show up with my travelling passport. Still, I won’t even bother going to NYC for that. I am not a big fan of a guy who will be our next president (I can bet four years worth of my college tuition that it’s going to be him). The ballot will provide me with a choice of another three: A political clown who is only good at giving drunken interviews , a Communist (I won’t even bother explaining why I am not going to vote for him or his party – ever) and a young-ish candidate who doesn’t have a good understanding of how he would run a country. Since there is no “against all” or “abstaining” option (it was removed a couple of years ago), I guess I will just stay at home doing school work.

Midterms are wreaking havoc over here : (